There is delight on everyone’s face as they climb the stairs, ready to find new romance and adventure. Darren knows each person. A library, whether on wheels or built of bricks, is a safe and happy place. At some stops, the monthly visit is a chance for a catch-up. The van rocks with laughter and bonhomie.
“She doesn’t like the lavender, she walks the long way round.”
“I haven’t lost my batteries, I’ve lost the plot.”
“He won’t go to Peterborough, it’s the parking.”
“Are you pleased with your young men?” (the decorators, before your mind wanders to further Mills & Boonish places).
Some do not merely borrow horror books, but donate them too.
A further joy is the use of the date stamp.
Modern library users may see books untainted when borrowed, but for many of us, the library label was a story of popularity. When I borrowed The Making of Doctor Who from Chorleywood Library, I could see the relentless desire the children of Hertfordshire had to read of Zygons and Zarbi.
One of my prized possessions is a secondhand copy of Ursula K Le Guin’s Earthsea trilogy that once helped the people of Ewell climb on a dragon’s back. Date stamp upon date stamp, each one emitting a sense of utter delight that a new reader had finally got the book in their hands.
On days like this, you see that libraries are not a luxury, but a necessity for many. It is not just the books, it is the connection, the communication.
I ended my day talking at Milton library. There were many librarians in the audience and none disproved my strong belief that there’s no such thing as a cruel librarian. (Actually, I did hear reports once of a cruel librarian, but I think it was myth created to reduce late fines.)
I wrote a poem for every stop. Here are some thoughts on romance.
Spinning the carousel
A dizzying deluge of desire
The offer of sultry surgeons
Dangerous Dukes
Jilted brides
And scorching nights
But never before chapter five
“A daring PR proposal for an ice hockey team”
“A hot architect makes a landscaper steam”
The virgin widow
The irresistible Greek
A woman thought too meek
For love
A playboy untrustworthy in his driving gloves
“Khalil finds his replacement queen”
Sometimes saucy but never obscene
All this passion with a cup of tea
Could anything be more English
Than love from the lending library?
Robin Ince is a comedian, broadcaster and poet. His book Bibliomaniac (Atlantic Books, £10.99) is out now. You can buy it from the Big Issue shop on Bookshop.org, which helps to support the Big Issue and independent bookshops.
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